I am sorry for the lack of posts in the last two weeks. As in my previous mood scarf blog I explained that I have Bi-Polar disorder. My lack of posts recently has been because of this, as I am having a dip in mood. As a result my mood scarf has taken on a sad shade of navy blue with the odd line of grey. To be honest I may have added or lost a day as when I am depressed I loose track of time/days/week and even months!!
Currently the scarf is looking like this:
It's also developed a weird shape which I have yet to decide if I should re-knit or keep as an expression of my mood. I guess now would be a good opportunity to explain a bit more about my disorder and how it affects me on a day to day bases.
I have been diagnosed as Bi-Polar Type 1, mixed stated, rapid cycling. I Found this neat little illustration that sort of explains about it
I have had bipolar all my life, even at a young age I remember feeling angry and different, in my teens my disorder developed to a type 2 which meant in a cycle of every 6 months I would over-achieve then crash and go to bed for 2 weeks then the world would seem better. I make light of it but I did try and kill myself and ran 4 different jobs at same time plus through a teaspoons at my husband 😜
In 2013 I had my cheek son and all hell in my mind broke loose, I became very very very ill, I tried to end my life 3 times and was left a shell with no control of my mind. I spent six months in something called "home treatment" to stop me going into hospital. We are now in 2015 and I still have people visit me every 2 weeks, to check I am alive.
I live my life day by day, hour by hour and minute by minute.
But I love my family.
And I love KNITTING!!
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